Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Devastated.



Inoperable.

The long awaited doctor phone call from the man that will be treating Joshua came today.

We are devastated.

Quite honestly,
my optimistic self didn't see this coming.

We will know conclusively when he gets here and they are able to do a heart cath
which we've known all along
but according to what they do know now,
the opinion of the cardiac team is that
it "doesn't look promising".

Please stand in the gap for our sweet boy and pray for his miracle.
My heart is heavy
yet I still hope.

And so, Lord, where do I put my hope? My only hope is in You. Psalm 39:7
posted at 4:53 PM

48 comments:

  1. ourchinagirlsAugust 3, 2011 at 5:22 PM

    My Mom always told me "Don't count your chickens before they hatch!" Your boy needs YOU and your family regardless what they say P.E.R.I.O.D!!

    Go get him Mama and love that boy up come what may!!

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  2. AnonymousAugust 3, 2011 at 5:24 PM

    Praying with you for that miracle.

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  3. jenniferAugust 3, 2011 at 5:26 PM

    Praying for his weak heart and your mommy heart, as well!!

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  4. ChrisAugust 3, 2011 at 5:28 PM

    Oh, Sonia....

    I am praying for him! :)

    Can he be any cuter????

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  5. MerrillAugust 3, 2011 at 5:31 PM

    Oh my goodness. Praying, praying, praying!

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  6. A Cup of Cold WaterAugust 3, 2011 at 5:47 PM

    do you remember this old song?
    "whose report will we believe?
    we shall believe the report of the Lord!
    His report says I am healed
    His report says I am filled
    His report says I am freed
    His report says victory."

    I stumbled upon your blog a month ago or so. your sons captured my heart. we are paperchasing for our second chin@ sn adoption. this time a son. i will be praying!
    erika

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  7. kayeAugust 3, 2011 at 5:49 PM

    God has it under control. We are praying hard. We love you lots Sonia and the whole famjam.

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  8. VickyAugust 3, 2011 at 5:54 PM

    Praying for you during this time of believing and trusting God. Praying for your sweet J to have a completely healed heart by the hand of God or the hands of the surgeons directed by God!

    NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE WITH GOD!

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  9. EmilyAugust 3, 2011 at 6:07 PM

    God created his heart- and just trust that He has an awesome plan for you and him.

    and doctors have been wrong before--- our son was completely misdiagnosed in China with kidney failure-- i wouldn't trust a Chinese diagnosis

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  10. Jennifer PAugust 3, 2011 at 6:12 PM

    I've been standing in that gap for awhile myself. Your Joshua needs your love no matter what. Think how those boys are feeling right now knowing that they have a family who WANTS them and LOVES them.
    Forever. How ever long that is.

    Praying for hearts, especially the physical ones.

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  11. JoleneAugust 3, 2011 at 6:14 PM

    Oh my goodness I am praying for your sweet son!

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  12. JeanAugust 3, 2011 at 6:22 PM

    DO NOT GIVE UP!

    Is there anyway they would transfer his file/give you a referral to Johns Hopkins or Boston?

    It is impossible for them to know until they see him. Until they run more tests. In the meantime we will pray, pray, pray for him!

    Praying for you, for him, for your family.

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  13. LaurieAugust 3, 2011 at 6:26 PM

    So sorry to hear that news, Sonia. I do pray that you can bring him home, love on him as much as possible, and get a miracle diagnosis from the doctors.

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  14. Ron & MariaAugust 3, 2011 at 6:29 PM

    PRAYING!

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  15. AngieAugust 3, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    Our hope is in the Great Physician, Sonia, not the hands of human drs., no matter how great they may be! Praying peace and hope that can only come from our Abba!

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  16. JenniferAugust 3, 2011 at 7:04 PM

    Hang in there! We will all be praying for a miracle!!!!

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  17. DebMAugust 3, 2011 at 7:22 PM

    Oh Sonia! I'm praying for him! And for you and your family. I pray for peace for you, for a miracle for him...and for your husband to get to China as soon as possible!

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  18. KarynAugust 3, 2011 at 7:34 PM

    This hits too close to home as we prepare to travel for our two seven year old boys (one post-op CHD) and puts any of our concerns into perspective! Our boys have special needs, but not urgent or life threatening ones. My heart goes out to you as I join you in prayer for a miracle healing.

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  19. Mary PatAugust 3, 2011 at 7:51 PM

    Ephesians 3:20-21 Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, unto him be glory in the church by Jesus Christ throughout the ages, world without end. Believing that He is able!

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  20. PatientlywaitingAugust 3, 2011 at 8:06 PM

    Sonia,

    We are praying for a miracle for your boy. Praying for healing and for him to come home soon. I am trusting in the One who called you to adopt "J" in the first place.

    Hugs,
    Robin

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  21. Jaclyn MAugust 3, 2011 at 8:28 PM

    Oh my dear friend. I am praying for your sweet son to be healed. I am praying for your heart to be comforted.

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  22. AnonymousAugust 3, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    I am been praying that you get him soon and pray that his heart can be treated.

    Hugs,
    Denise

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  23. AnonymousAugust 3, 2011 at 8:43 PM

    We live in GA and I know a family who is in California with their son who they adopted from China with a severe CHD who had heart surgery a couple of weeks ago. Their blog is www.thespitlersjourneytochina.blogspot.com
    I know they found this doctor when others would not perform his surgery. Their son Noah who is 7 and is doing well. His Oxygen sats were very low and he was very ill. Also I know they had issues traveling with him in China as well with lack of oxygen on the flights. She has most of it journaled on her blog. I am Praying for your family.

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  24. AnonymousAugust 3, 2011 at 8:49 PM

    As a Mommy it takes your breath away when you hear this. It hurts to the core. I will be praying for your family for wisdom, discernment, and guidance. I agree with the other person who suggested Boston or CHOP. Also, I am not sure what his diagnosis is, but there is also a surgeon in California who has done wonders for a little girl we are friends with who was given an inoperable diagnosis at birth. No matter how the Lord unfolds this story, you are his Mama and he already feels your love from the communication you have had with him. If we can help, we are here.
    Praying for your family,
    Angela
    jaxgatorcrew@gmail.com

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  25. AnonymousAugust 3, 2011 at 8:53 PM

    Hi,
    I posted the comment above with the Spitler's blog.
    Sorry, I could not get my google account to work.
    Praying,
    Brandi
    everyoneatsrice.blogspot.com

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  26. AnonymousAugust 3, 2011 at 8:54 PM

    FYI...I just checked on my friends carepage who is actually out in California for another surgery right now and and the surgeon's name is Dr. Hanley. Hope this helps. Angela

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  27. UnknownAugust 3, 2011 at 9:07 PM

    Stay hopeful and optimistic. God is still on His throne and He is the one who has the final say.

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  28. ChristyAugust 3, 2011 at 9:15 PM

    All things are possible. So sorry for this frustrating blow. Big hugs and praying for God's miraculous work and healing power in Joshua's life. Thinking of you.

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  29. Sally-Girl!August 3, 2011 at 10:11 PM

    Hope only in our Savior our greatest physician! He will not lead you astray! Thinking of you and loving on you from California!!

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  30. WaitingfaithfullyAugust 3, 2011 at 10:27 PM

    Oh friend . . .

    My heart hurts for you . . . for Joshua . . . for the scary place you are in. But He is there Sonia, in that scary place you are in . . . He is the light in the dark. He is the beat in Joshua's heart. He is the one who called you and John to be J.J.'s rescuers on this earth. Our mighty King is still on the throne and our Jesus is still in the business of miracles. Hang on friend, and when it gets tough (like now) know that others are holding you up . . . holding J.J. up . . . standing with you, believing for a miracle. He will not leave you. He will not leave your Joshua John. Like you said--He is our ever present HOPE! Always.

    Wish I could be there to give you a hug . . . a shoulder . . . a tissue. You can do this friend. Praying J.J. home.

    Love you,

    Tina

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  31. Norberto KurrleAugust 3, 2011 at 11:08 PM

    This is a faith challenge, dear one. Take courage and hope in the promises of the Lord, “I am the LORD, the God of all mankind. Is anything too hard for me?" -Jer 32:27

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  32. LoriAugust 3, 2011 at 11:48 PM

    Sonia- I, too, feel devastated and so sad with you! But God--- oh, BUT GOD.... He's so much bigger than all of our fears! The "end" of this story is unsure. But each step toward that end is ordained in God's all knowing and all loving hand. You can trust Him for every detail. In possibly facing the same hard "realities" with our Rachel... I understand your fears of the unknown. But I have believed from the very beginning that our sweet children, never orphans again, in the very LEAST need to know the love of a mommy and daddy, and most importantly, the love of Jesus.... not only in their living, but even more so, in their dying. Our children may well die. We both knew that when we signed up for this journey... BUT they will die knowing that they are safe and LOVED! Let's trust God together that it is better to have loved and lost.... than to never have loved at all! And that in loving, we will gain the greatest gift of all!

    Standing with you, dear friend--- Lori McCary

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  33. SarahAugust 4, 2011 at 6:14 AM

    praying for your sweet boy...

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  34. LisaAugust 4, 2011 at 6:17 AM

    Surgery or no surgery, Joshua is yours and he is waiting to be united with his forever family. We will pray for his safety. Enjoy every moment of cherishing him, before and after he's in your arms:)

    Love,
    Lisa Murphy

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  35. LoriAugust 4, 2011 at 6:46 AM

    "But Jesus beheld them and said unto them, with men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible." Matthew 19:26

    We'll be praying for you and Joshua.

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  36. UnknownAugust 4, 2011 at 6:49 AM

    Praying. For all of you.

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  37. ShonniAugust 4, 2011 at 7:17 AM

    Ohhh, I am so sorry and will be praying for ya’ll!!

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  38. LariAugust 4, 2011 at 7:18 AM

    Oh Sonia! I'm so sorry! Will be praying that they're wrong and the cath will reveal new info.

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  39. StacyAugust 4, 2011 at 7:22 AM

    Sonia,
    I got the 'heart in the gut' feeling when I read this.
    Ditto what Lori Mc said.
    And I am praying like crazy for you.
    Much love!!!!
    Stacy
    Thanks for your encouraging words this week. You will never know how much I needed them!

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  40. JaimeAugust 4, 2011 at 9:14 AM

    Sonia, I know how hard those words are. But I truly believe there is a reason that our children were brought into our lives, and I just know they will be the greatest blessing. I will continue to pray for Joshua, and for a miracle for his heart. If you ever want to talk, let me know. Not sure if you knew this but we were told at the time of referral by several doctors that Elisyn is also inoperable.

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  41. momAugust 4, 2011 at 9:17 AM

    Sonia/John, lifting your child and these needs up in prayer.
    So grateful for all these blessings of doctors out there given by your bloggy friends- will be praying for them including the one you are already seeing.
    For Daniel, we were very happy with John Hopkins (both the cleft and cardio teams). My friend Heidi's kids (older children adoptions too) had open heart surgery and I can ask her where.. I'll email you. You may already know her from another group..

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  42. Blessed FamilyAugust 4, 2011 at 9:36 AM

    Sonia praying for you... (I am Jills friend Heidi)... my son also looked REALLY grim when we got him but with surgery at CHOP (philly) he is doing great. He may need another surgery but he has no restrictions right now. I just brought home a 9 year old who also had the same issues as Aiden (tetrologoy of fallot)... Praying for you. My friend also had her heart surgeries done at John Hopkins and was also happy with them. Praying for you!

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  43. AngelaAugust 4, 2011 at 9:40 AM

    Praying for each of you, sweet friend....

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  44. ColleenAugust 4, 2011 at 10:12 AM

    Oh, Sonia...my heart has been broken since reading this. We WILL stand in the gap for you! Isn't it a privilege to know that sweet Joshua is bathed in prayer and that our God is MIGHTY TO SAVE!

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  45. UnknownAugust 4, 2011 at 11:22 AM

    Sonia, I promise you God has this. It's in the palm of his hand. There is a plan and a purpose. I'm not the best model for remembering to rely on Him, as I have an obsessive need for control, but in this case, just keep plowing forward, as I know you will. Besides providing a family for those 3 gorgeous little boys, you are inspiring people all over the country with your strength, courage, wit, and faith.

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  46. AnonymousAugust 4, 2011 at 2:02 PM

    Amy couldn't have said it better! We are with you in prayer for that little one (and you and the family as well).
    Daddyo and Melissa

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  47. MonicaAugust 5, 2011 at 9:22 AM

    Oh. my. Just praying for you and that little sweetheart. God has a plan for that little fellow's life and your part in it. Don't know how it all plays out, but He sure does. I just know it's gonna be a wonderful story! Love and hugs to you, Sonia.

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  48. CindyAugust 6, 2011 at 5:12 AM

    Sonia, I just had to send my love and prayers. Keep believing.
    'Now therefore stand and see this great thing which the Lord will do before your eyes'. 1 Samuel 12:16
    Hugs, Cindy

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