I'm not sure what part of me thinks that I can undo 7 years of institutionalized living in the 2 months we've been home
And there is a lot to be said for hope.
There are so many "issues" that will accompany your newly adopted kiddo when they are placed in your arms in that civil affairs office.
They will indeed come to you with the cute outfit that you sent them.
They will come to you with the Build a Bear dog with your voice that you sent.
They will come to you with the book and the new toy that you sent them.
They may even come with a smile.
But if you look closely they will also carry with them years of living in an institution and in their back pockets will be the rules and tools that they used to survive when you weren't there.
And orphanage rules and tools don't so much mesh with a "normal" family structure.
Survival of the fittest? Nope.
Take care of just yourself? Nope.
Watch your back at all times? Nope.
Show no weakness? Nope.
Hide and hoard? Nope.
And let me tell ya, sometimes it's true.....
love can conquer all.
I've got a front row seat to the hottest show in town and I get the honor and privilege of watching this healing, this transformation, play out right here in my living room, across my dining room table, in my backyard, at my kitchen counter, and in the nighttime hugs and kisses
day after day.
I would read countless blogs while we were waiting for the boys and as I watched family after family come home they all began to say the same thing.
"It feels like he/she/they've always been here!"
And let me just jump on the keepin it real band wagon for just a moment to tell ya,
I wasn't so sure that feeling was going to come anytime soon at certain points in the last 8 weeks.
In the middle of the crying.
In the middle of the attitude.
In the middle of trying to adjust to having 6 boys
"It feels like they've always been here"
was not anywhere near about to come out of my mouth.
Here we are.
8 weeks home.
I am sitting in the middle of the living room, surrounded by Lego's, watching Jacob put together the coolest lego car you have evah seen and I can only say one thing....
It feels like they've always been here.
Why I Never Called it Rape
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