A distracted parent.
That's me.
In case you think I am actually here
I am not.
I am already in China.
My heart is there.
My head is there.
Every thought and feeling is there.
Yep. I packed up months ago and moved there.
And to have the rest of me still be here,
is tough.
I am completely distracted to my everyday life. I stalk my mailbox and my email more times a day than I will admit. Spend hours on the computer late into the night sobbing with joy over the journey's of others, I'm tellin ya. It ain't pretty.
And don't even get me started on those Gotcha Day videos...those things are like crack to waiting parents
....ok..
I've never had crack
so I don't really know
thank goodness
but I'm just assuming.
I am a wreck.
A happy wreck,
A sad wreck.
An excited wreck.
A nervous wreck.
You name the emotion and I'm there.
I cry at the drop of a hat, good, bad, whatev, doesn't matter.
Sappy commercials make me cry
tucking my kids in bed at night makes me cry
boo
hoo
cry-baby
that's me.
I'm not much of a shopper or spender but man alive retail therapy has sure helped!!
Kiddo #6's first care package is all ready to go.
Totally premature I know.
But tangibally being able to do something for him...
ahhhh, makes this momma feel better.
Their first joint care package...
also ready to go.
Ahhhhh, feeling really better now.
#6's care package is identical to Joey's. I think having matching things(though he has the Toy Story version and Joey has the Cars version) will on some level cement that they(possibly, hopefully, please Lord move this mountain) get to be brothers and best friends forever.I guess I don't really have a point to all of this. Other than to share...that this is where I'm at. So if you see me out and about and I have mascara running down my face looking like I belong in an 80's rock band it's probably because I saw a sappy laundry detergent commercial or something epic like that.
It's all good though.
I'll just re-apply the make-up later and start all over again.
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I could not wait to buy something for my daughters. Yes, it made it feel real finally after that purchase. Unfortunately, Ivy never got anything I sent her except our photo album. But, that was really all she needed.
ReplyDeleteI hope you hear something soon.
Ugghhh, I could have written your post...I'm that same emotional wreck that cries over everything and can't focus on anything but someone else's China journey. Mine will happen eventually, but not soon enough. I hope to follow your journey soon...
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Monica
Oh yea- I know exactly what you mean.
ReplyDeleteI've been a wreck for awhile now! Finally cried enough to float the ark for 40 days when we had the little CA issue last week. It was good to let it all out!
Now the gnawing in my stomach can stop because I am so outta here!
Retail therapy definitely helps! Love the gifts for your boys!
My sister is waiting for the word for her baby (she is adopting internationally as well).... and the wait is interminable! Best of luck to you and your family!
ReplyDeleteYou explain it perfectly! And I hear ya on the Gotcha vids...i would torture myself daily! I don't have a gotcha vid posted but our one year anniversary...its 12 minutes long if you would like some more crack...LOL (Sept 08 archives)
ReplyDeleteI did a blog post while I was waiting....it was in January and I had Macie's suitcase out and dresses all over the bed deciding what to pack....that was when I thought I was traveling in June....I didn't travel until September....yea I was a basketcase! LOL
the wait is ZERO fun! but those sweet children are WORTH the wait!
I clung to Proverbs 3:4-5 (because I just didn't UNDERSTAND why I had to wait soooooo long!)
Love,
Jill :)
I had to cut myself off from stalking others, and as for retail therapy... oh my husband wishes it did not work so well
ReplyDelete